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What Do Women Want?  A Must-Read for Guys


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Men always are asking me, What Do Women Want?  Well here are the 9 must-know tips that will answer that question once and for all.  If you are a guy, read on.  If you are a woman, share this blog with your boyfriend or husband.  You will be very happy you did!

What Do Women Want?  Tip #1  Flirt before getting into nitty-gritty sexual pursuit

Whether they are just meeting you, or married for decades, women love flirting.  Don’t just grab at her in a blunt sexual way.  Instead, use soft touch, a lingering gentle kiss on the neck or a wicked wink.  Caress or kiss her hand.  Flirting goes a long way to get the juices going. And it will bring a woman’s attention to the relationship and to you.

What Do Women Want?  Tip #2  Be a bit cocky when you do flirt.

Give yourself a Diamond Self nickname like Captain Jack, or Slow Hand Luke.  Look at her like you’re about to devour her with your eyes.  Make cocky statements like, “You are going to love what I’ll be up to in bed with you!” This is a matter of acting confident.  It will give her the vibe of the alpha male, which is usually irresistible to women.

What Do Women Want?  Tip #3  Be consistent in giving her attention

If you are dating, make sure you make regular contact via text, calls and setting up dates.  Don’t let her fall into anxiety wondering if you are ghosting her.  If you are living together or married, don’t get lost in work and diss her!  Pay attention and respond rapidly when your beloved initiates contact with you.

What Do Women Want?  Tip #4 Compliment her

Women absolutely love appreciation and validation! Notice what she does, looks like, or is wearing.  Appreciate the gifts of beauty, presence, food and love she brings.  Then give her sincere compliments.  You can say, You really make me feel so happy!  I love that sexy dress on you!  You are the most wonderful woman and the best cook in the world!  You get the idea!

What Do Women Want?  Tip #5  Process your real feelings with her

Women like to hear what is really going on with their partners at an emotional level.  If you are having problems at work, let her know you are feeling anxious, sad, or resentful of you’re a#*hole boss.  This is so much better than just coming home in a foul mood and getting angry at her. Or withdrawing from her.  Instead ask her if you can go for a walk together and talk about what is really going on with you.  This way, she will feel close to you and can be emotionally supportive. Women love to be emotionally there for their guys.

What Do Women Want?  Tip #6  When she is talking, simply listen to her (especially when she’s upset!)

Women need to be heard.  They need to process their thoughts and emotions even more than guys do.  This is very important in order to have a relationship in which your woman feels understood by you.  And close to you.  When she talks, do not bring up your concerns.  Stop talking yourself and, instead, listen carefully.  And nod your head to indicate you understand what she is feeling. You will have one happy woman!

What Do Women Want?  Tip #7  Do not attempt to fix her problems if she does not ask you to

But what if she is massively upset, crying and miserable?  Or furious because someone screwed her over.  In those situations, you will feel like you HAVE to give her advice.  That you need to help her to quiet down and to stop being so upset.  To solve her problem once and for all.  Resist these helpful impulses If she does not ask for help or advice!  Instead just listen!

What Do Women Want?  Tip #8  Promptly help her solve her problems if she asks you for help

If she finally admits she cannot fix the computer issue that is driving her crazy.  Or that she need help in figuring out how to handle her narcissistic boss, and then asks you for help, give it to her right away.  Show her that she is important in your life.  And that being for her comes first.  No excuses about you being too busy at work, etc.  Drop everything , give her advice and/or go to her and  help her out.  Show her that she is your Beloved!  And you are there to care for her and help make her life great.

What Do Women Want?  Tip #9  Tell her how much you love her!

In fact, you can use texts, emojis, cards, words, gifts and gestures to tell your beloved how much you really love her. Whether you have been together for several months or many decades, this is very important.  Women thrive on romance!

So there you have 9 key tips on what women want.  If you are having problems with creating the kind of love you really want, have a complimentary Breakthrough-To-Love Session by phone or Skype.

 

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What is Emotional Cheating? Five Signs to Help You Know


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Are you wondering, what is emotional cheating?  Maybe you are feeling lonely in your relationship or marriage.  But it seems like your spouse is focused elsewhere.  He or she may have a very “special” close friend, maybe at work or in your social network.  And you wonder if they are having an affair.  It seems like there is nothing sexual going on between them.  But then again, when you find evidence that your partner is so loving, so interested in, so responsive, so eager to see the “special friend,” it feels like a loss to you.  You find yourself being jealous and not wanted them to spend time together.

You may worry about when their next interaction is going to occur.  Is there a text message from the friend?  A special email?  Requests for help?  You may feel like you are running number two, while the special friend is getting the number one treatment from your partner.  And you may be resentful or quite angry about the whole matter.  These are all signs that your partner may be emotional cheating, which is quite destructive to your relationship.  Ok then. Let’s look at five signs that will help you know if your relationship is in trouble.

What is Emotional Cheating?  Sign #1:  A “Special” Friend is More Important than You

When his or her friend calls needing a hand with something, does your partner respond and leave you in the lurch?  Does he or she turn attention away from you or abandon the projects you are working on together?  Do you feel like your needs and wants are not top priority to your partner?  That you are not top priority?  This is a strong sign of the presence of emotional cheating in your relationship.

What is Emotional Cheating?  Sign #2:  You Fight with Your Partner Again and Again about His or Her Friend

The two of you have repeated conflicts about the person who has come between you.  The fights never resolve.  They just repeat over and over, with no end in sight. Even though you explain that the “special” friend is causing the problem, your partner can’t quite see it. If fact, your partner may blame you for having a problem!

What is Emotional Cheating?  Sign #3:   You Feel Ongoing Resentment and Jealousy About Your Partner’s Friend

This sign assumes that jealousy is not part of your typical issue when it comes to love relationships–which is a whole other story!  Given that this is not the case, read on:  If you almost always feel resentful or angry about this third person being in your lives, this is a strong clue that your partner is emotionally cheating on you.  Ditto if you feel jealous when your partner interacts with their special friend.  Their relationship is causing you to have ongoing suffering.

What is Emotional Cheating?  Sign #4:  You Have Asked Your Partner to Cut Back or End the Relationship with His or Her Friend and are Met with Resistance or Refusal

You come out and ask for you partner to have less interaction with this person or end the relationship altogether, as it is causing so much trouble for the two of you.  Your partner either pays lip service to doing it or hides having contact with the person and sneaks around behind your back.  Or refuses outright to nix the friendship.   This sign means your relationship may be in serious trouble due to real emotional, and possibly physical cheating.

What is Emotional Cheating?  Sign #5:  Your Relationship is Going Downhill

Do you feel like your relationship is getting more and more distant?  Are you fighting more?  Having more angry exchanges?  This may mean that your love relationship is sliding down hill—another BIG red flag.  Do you have angry times where you freeze each other out and don’t talk?  Fights where he is totally defensive and blames you for any problems?  Is he hyper critical of you?  Is this getting worse and worse over time?  These are serious red flags that emotional and possibly physical cheating is going on to such an extent that it may result in you breaking up with your partner or spouse.   This is definitely time  to work on your love relationship so that you do not lose it.

So there you have five answers to the question, What is emotional cheating?  Since so much attention, energy and good will are going out of your relationship when there is emotional cheating, it absolutely can lead to a breakup. You need to take action to help circumnavigate this obstacle and come together in a new way with your partner.  Which can be done!

If you are having these issues, and in particular, your partner refuses to cut back or end his or her “special” relationship and things are truly going downhill (signs 4 & 5), I would highly recommend  you take advantage of one of our free Breakthrough-to-Love  Coaching sessions.  It can begin a journey that turns things around and help you come back to your relationship with your Beloved better than ever.

 

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What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention


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Are you wondering what to text a guy to get his attention?  Especially, if you are in the early stages of learning digital dating it can be very challenging!  How do you get him to engage and respond?  How do you avoid blowing it and sending him into ghost-land? After all, you are not a writer. So it can be very hard.  But not any more. So here are eight messaging secrets that will have it raining men.

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 1: Use the Old Best Friend Technique

Imagine texting one of your best friends or a dear relative. Think about how connected, accepted and warm you feel as you write the text. And how comfortable, real, and relaxed you are with this person. Now imagine being that connected to a new match. A great fantasy, right? The truth is, you CAN use the same kind of experience and feeling  when connecting to a new guy. Simply program yourself to be an old friend or relative who is entirely comfortable with him.. He will feel the vibe in your message!

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 2: Use a phrase that comes from your most confident self

Guys love a woman who values herself, who is confident about just how fabulous she is. Men who are winners like to work to win a woman. This kind of confidence is like catnip to them! Here’s how to harness your confidence: Remember a time when you felt confident, lovable and loving.  I call this your Diamond Self identity.  So give that identity a nickname, like Chosen Goddess of Light and Love, Amazing Grace, Vivacious Vixen or Beloved Mighty Isis. Then ask yourself, what would my empowered high-value Diamond Self say? What would she write in in this particular message? Feel into it. Imagine the great self-valuing things she would say. You will get amazing messages coming out of you!  Irresistible messages!

For example if a guy puts a heart on your profile photo, you could message him:  I see you have good taste 😉

Another example, to use to respond to a guy who hints you may live too far away is: An amazing woman is worth traveling for! 😉

An additional example, in response to the question, Why have you been single so long?  You would say, I’ve been enjoying a super-cool career!  Just recently I decided I’m ready for to meet one lucky guy 😉

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 3: End your message with a question.

If you end your message or text with a question, you will get the guy’s attention because you are letting him know you are interested in him and his life.  Plus this will also make it easy for him to respond to you—he doesn’t have to come up with something new that is clever and engaging.  Ask general, casual, open-ended questions like How did your day go? Do you enjoy living here? How did you get interested in X? What drew you to my profile?

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 4: Use emojis for flirting

The emojis provide the non-verbals, the warmth and the flirty feeling tone for him to respond to.  So use smiley faces, winking faces, blowing- kiss faces.  One in each text works well. For example, in replying to this message from a guy, which reads:

Hi again, Joanne! Tell me, are you on the front lines these days? I ask because it says you are a medical professional.

BTW, I live in NYC, Manhattan.

So you could reply:

Hi Bob! Yes, on the front lines, but sooo safe and getting a great deal from being of service.  Believe it or not, there are laughs too! 😊  Are you WFH?

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 5:  You call the shots in the interaction!

Guys love a bit of a challenge from a confident, flirty woman. You don’t need to respond directly to a request or answer any questions he asks.  Stay in your comfort zone. You decide what wonderful, empowered flirty message you will write.  So if early on a guy texts, Send me your pic please so I can add to your contact, you can reply: Oh those are quite valuable, LOL!  I’d have to get to know you! 😉

Or if he texts, Hi it’s Jason!  What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?  So you can respond with, I’m in a great place, Jason! And one lucky guy will get to join me 😊

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 6: Share an experience you had related to an activity he mentions

If possible share a specific experience you enjoyed related to an activity he mentions and add a question about it. For example, if he mentions the Space X launch, you might write, I saw the take-off live! It was amazing!  Did you see it?

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 7: Use his name if you have it and flirt by throwing in a bit of a challenge

Using his name is another awesome way to create a feeling of connection between you. And giving him a bit of a challenge is a great way to flirt!  If he’s into baseball, you could say something like, Well, Jason, if they ever play baseball again, what about a Red Sox-Cubs World Series? How cool would that be? This kind of flirting, coupled with your confident messaging is irresistible!

What to Text a Guy to Get His Attention Tip 8:  Be upbeat and fun

Guys love to have fun!  So have fun with them.  For example, you could say, I just had a breakthrough in my strawberry shortcake recipe! One taste and you’ll be hooked (fair warning)😊  Or, I always wake up smiling. I think it could be your fault.😉

So there you have 8 key tips for texts that will grab a guy’s attention.  And if you need some coaching please be sure to register for a free session with one of my expert professionals.

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Online Dating – Needle in a Haystack?

No doubt about it, Internet dating has become a unique part of modern love. In fact, in New York, Internet dating has become so popular that it is now simply called ‘partner shopping’ or ‘hyper dating’.

Online personal ads were one of the first niche markets on the web at the beginning of the net revolution and statistics now predict that 50% of single people will hook up with a partner online. However, with thousands of dating websites to choose from around the world, finding the right one can be difficult.

If you’ve ever joined a general dating site you’ll know that trawling through a stream of profiles, with reams of personal information about housekeeping habits and suchlike, doesn’t mean that you will actually get along with someone. But the good news is that online dating is evolving, with recent trends showing a move towards specialist dating sites that aim to bring people with similar interests together.

Sometimes linked to lifestyles, such as dating sites for bikers, interest-based dating sites are leading the way for a new generation of people looking for love on the worldwide web. With literally millions of people using the internet as a new social arena in which to make new friends and find a partner, people are discovering that there is a much better chance of making that all important connection through a specialist site where the members have shared interests.

A recent survey by music-mate.com revealed that 80% of its members preferred interest-based dating sites, stating that they found it easier to make the first contact.

Music-mate.com creator Diane Ainslie understands this new trend: ‘I’ve used the internet in the past to find a date and I really liked the idea of being able to meet up with people without all the usual fuss. But I often found I didn’t have a lot in common with the people I met. As a huge music fan, I realised that meeting people who shared a passion for the same music as me was a great basis to develop new relationships. You have something to talk about straight away!’

And there’s the key. Joining a general dating site can be like visiting a strange city without a map. How do you even begin to find your way around? In choosing an interest-based site you’re starting on familiar ground. It’s easier to get talking and you’re more likely to meet someone you have something in common with. If half of all single people are using the Internet to find a partner, finding that special someone is like finding a needle in a haystack. It might just be time to jump on the latest bandwagon and find a dating site that interests you!

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6 Benefits of Online Dating

Online dating isn’t something that attracts everybody and sometimes we have heard some very scary things about the same. At the initial stages, it was perceived that anyone looking for a dating partner online was actually just desperate. Today, it isn’t such a taboo and with the technological rise, there is no end in sight. While some of us prefer to meet in real life, there are some thrills associated with online dating. Some of the benefits are:

• Finding a match is very fast

When you choose to use a dating site, you only need to create a profile and then literally browse singles in a matter of seconds. Usually, you will need to create a profile where you input things like email address, location, gender, name and the dating preferences that you have. It is important to take some time as you create your profile so as to ensure you get the desired effect.

• affordability

When you decide to meet people physically at a club or a bar, then you will need to pay an entry fee and even drinks. Sometimes you may end up spending money on food too. This may be a bit too high for you and you don’t have a guarantee whether the person you meet will be special or not. For dating sites, it is possible to enjoy free trial for some time. The membership you get exposes you to millions of potential singles. You can be able to pick a date that could develop into a relationship and later on marriage.

• Saving time

Going out at night as a single is demanding since you have to pick a spot, dress up and then drive or take a cab to the destination where you have to stick for some hours waiting for potential people that you can talk to. There are no guarantees. With online dating, you only need an internet connection and you can meet people sitting in your living room.

• You can be specific about what you want

When you meet someone in real life, it is exciting because they are a mystery that you unravel with time. However with time you may discover something about them that you don’t approve of. You may hate smoking and later discover the person you met actually smokes. With online sites, you can be very specific saying you don’t approve of smoking. You can make a whole list of desires that you are so as to find if anyone fits the criteria set.

• You establish common ground very fast

Getting into a conversation is one of the greatest setbacks that most people face when they are on a real date. Striking a conversation with a total stranger offline is one of the hardest things that you may have to deal with. As for online dating, things are much easier. You have already given out quite a bit of information so striking a conversation shouldn’t be too hard.

• Less stress

Online dating is still quite a young industry. However, it is gaining popularity because it takes away so much pressure from you. You can control as much or as little as you want.

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Smart Dating Tips for Men Looking for Women Online

No matter how you do it, online dating is hard. Technology and culture have changed over the years and the dating skills that men looking for women online needed have changed drastically. Nowadays, more and more people are meeting through online dating platforms and the rules are being rewritten. Whether it is men looking for women online or vice-versa, dating platforms are transforming gender roles and promoting gender diversity.

Choose the right platform

There are literally thousands of online dating websites and applications available for singles. But it is very important to figure out which dating platform works the best for you. Connectingsingles.com is the trendiest 100% free online dating site that is genuine. With great quality results, this dating site eases the whole men looking for women online dating experience and helps many single people find other single people online. Quality plus affordability are the two major factors that make people choose Connectingsingles.com over other online dating sites.

Add personality

Creating a profile is an important part of online dating. It is basically your resume to the online dating world and not something that you should pay no heed to. Your dating profile should showcase the kind of person you are. Your bio should have a list of things that you like so that the person visiting your profile can have a clear understanding of your personality. Having enough pictures on your profile is important and make sure you look happy in each one of them. Have a couple of photos with friends but the majority of them should showcase you at interesting places to make sure you attract a certain type of person.

Be honest

Be honest with your profile by uploading recent pictures and an honest description of yourself. Make sure your profile is flattering, detailed, and eye-catching. Make sure that all the information about yourself that you give out is true. This way people can know exactly what to expect when they meet you so that you can connect with people who are genuinely interested in your personality.

Respect the personal space

Women set certain boundaries to keep themselves safe in the world of online dating. Men looking for women online should respect these boundaries and ask for consent every time you cross it. These boundaries are a game-changer when it comes to success in online dating and can help you spot red-flags and walk away from a potential heartbreak down the road. If a woman has set some boundaries that don’t mean that she’s high-maintenance. It simply shows what she will and won’t put up with while interacting online.

Stop blabbering and ask questions

This is pretty basic but needs to be said. You need to ask questions to keep the conversation going. Most men get ghosted by women in online dating because they wouldn’t shut up about themselves. Start a general conversation and go from there. Don’t blabber too much about yourself and ask about her. After talking about yourself for a minimal time, throw the ball in her court with something as simple as “How about yourself?”

Don’t play

Don’t play with someone’s emotions. Nobody wins. If you are not interested in someone, be mature enough to let them know. Stop ghosting them or avoiding them every time they text you. If you are interested in someone, don’t play hard to get or be unavailable. Be kind, understanding, and most importantly, be yourself.

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4 Online Dating Profile No No’s For Women

This is an urgent message to any woman who uses online dating sites.

Online dating profile writing is a task, mostly because you are thinking about writing an out-standing profile more than writing about yourself that men would love to know. Okay, that’s very vague too but you must do some research before just spitting out your resume on your online dating profile!

Revealing some of the worst online dating profile mistakes most women are probably making and some of them are instant deal killers!

Writing more than needed

Most profiles on online dating apps say a story that nobody is interested in reading past the first line. The first and most important thing women must know about men is they do not like too much talking, in case of online profiles, too much of writing. Men are known to have a short attention span and don’t want to know so many details, that’s what getting to know you should be all about. Men like short and to the point dating profiles, just like ESPN football summaries!

List writing

Are going grocery shopping? “I’m looking for a man who likes traveling, dogs, food, children… “. You write a list of everything your ideal man needs to be and everything you are. Of course, you have a list but that’s not meant to be on your dating profile! Save it for the time when you genuinely start thinking about a guy, your dating profile is not even the first step!

Being Pretentious

Showing off and telling about yourself are two very obviously noticeable differences anyone could tell. Like we women don’t like men who show off and are pretentious about their so-called happening life, men too hate pretentious bitches! You need not have a flashy wardrobe, makeup or cars screaming from your profile and pictures. The last thing you want if the guy to find out who you are in real and then leave. Show who you really are and you will attract the right kind of male traffic on every online dating website.

Being to Generic

Yes, this point is the one that scares every woman out and then we start to do all the wrong things to make our profile noticeable. On any online dating app, look at 10 random profiles right now, I bet you’ll find surprising similarities! Everyone wants to show they’re -Fun, adventurous, love traveling, eating out and of course, taking walks along the beach! It’s like the hobby section of every resume – reading, music, traveling!

You may be doing these but don’t make them sound so generic, make the ordinary extraordinary. For example, “I’m adventurous” doesn’t tell me anything, however by writing “I’m taking flying lessons” you’ve got my attention. To stand out in the online crowd you need a profile that is unique and compelling.

The profile is just about whetting the appetite and giving men just enough to want to find out more about you. Avoid these instant deal killers and consider rewriting your profile having these don’ts open in front of you. These will surely build you a profile with all the yes’s!

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3 Online Dating Profile Samples To Get You Noticed

Writing an online dating profile can be difficult for many people using a dating website. There are many generic dating examples online that sound the same. Many dating members are searching on how to write the perfect online dating profile. Here are 3 creative examples that I’ve concocted, which can inspire a single guy or single girl on any dating website!

First Example:

“Hello to everyone reading this! I’m new to the online dating scene and have heard good and bad things about it. I never assume anything before finding out all the facts on my own. I am newly single and want to move slowly back into dating. If you are someone who likes to take things slow and use their slow cooker, send me a message!

“My adventurous side has me watching anything on storm watching and would love to try it with someone who knows what they are doing. It’s always great to learn new things and have a list of things I’d like to accomplish by the end of the year. It would be nice to meet someone who wants to learn new hobbies and interests from each other. I am a chef by profession and artist by the weekend. I am a self-taught artist who enjoys dabbling in paint, ceramics and anything unusual.

“If you are a risk-taker and would like to know more, I would enjoy receiving a message from you. Tell me what you find risky. Have a creative week and watch out for that storm!”

Second Example:

“I really don’t want to bore you to tears by writing about what a great catch I am. I’m sure you’ve read many dating profiles that have told you they are perfect for you! I’ve always believed that actions speak louder than words don’t you think? It would be great to meet face to face for coffee and see where it goes from there.

“I’m not scared to let you know that I have flaws. I’m a perfectionist and can use a whole package of good paper trying to handwrite something. With the internet world taking over, it’s nice to write an actual handwritten letter to family and friends. I know that recycling is huge so don’t worry, I do use the paper I’ve scrapped for other things! You would think because I’m a perfectionist that I have the perfect job. That, I have not perfected yet. I’m still looking for my true calling and am taking part-time classes at the University after work.

“If you are honest and are looking to meet someone for casual dating, make sure to email me. I am looking to date but if it leads to something more, it’s always a good thing. Don’t forget to tell me something about yourself!”

Third Example:

“I’m a person who enjoys meeting new people all the time. I love to socialize, embrace life and am a lot of fun if I say so myself! Online dating has been quite the adventure and I am still looking for that special someone. If you are looking for someone genuine, I’m your man! I don’t have patience for people who pretend to be something they are not.

“I’m honest, forgiving and love to laugh. If you can make me laugh, I would be interested in speaking to you. There are too many people who take life seriously and don’t make time to enjoy the finest pleasures. That would include taking in the outdoors, sitting in front of a fireplace and eating gummy worms on a regular basis for me!

“Tell me what your idea of having fun is. I enjoy the weekends out when I am not working in the week and would love to have someone accompany me. It could be an evening of taking in the local comedy scene or local bands. Drop me an email and we’ll chat soon!”